Okay...okay....You can probably all guess what happened.
I trekked down in the rain to the gym...slapped on my 80's montage of fabulous workout music (Starting with "Take On Me" by Ah ha) and grabbed a couple of those little hand weights that you can carry around with you. I took the smallest ones...after about 5 minutes it felt like I was carrying an extra 400lbs.
I climbed up on to the treadmill..and started her up. It was just me and the bald dude that is there every day...he walks on the treadmill...he is there walking when I get there..no matter what time I get there...and he's a walkin when I leave. **thankfully there are 2 treadmills...but he's always on the newer more fabulous treadmill that has a cup holder..**
Anywho...I was just getting in to my groove (I love that instrumental part in the middle)...trying to not focus on the extra 400lbs I was carrying (why'd I pick those up anyways?) and I closed my eyes...for just a moment...
Now...I'd like to point out..this could have been catastrophic. My mind flashes to an episode of "The Biggest Loser" when the chubby chick bites it on the treadmill and falls down..the treadmill quickly dispatches her to the floor but not before serious road rash on pretty much her entire body..not to mention what it might do to ones ego.
Luckily, my mishap was caused by my foot getting a little to far over and off of the little belt that spins (not total and complete exhaustion from working out with Jillian). This caused me to trip...
Thankfully I was able to right myself before any major damage occurred. I did, however, issue a very sharp..very high pitched..tiny little squeal....causing the bald dude to look over at me. With much haste I went for the little handle bars..oh no...my hands are full!
"She's going for a little help here" says Chinese Howard Cosell
I was able to secure myself..but not without jamming two of my fingers on my right hand causing them to bend back at a very uncomfortable angle. "That looks like it hurt..but, A GREAT SAVE BY LEE KERSHAW" says my inner commentator. Thanks Chinese Howard Cosell...I appreciate your support.
Well, I did 40 minutes on that treadmill, next to bald dude...pacing me the whole way. I did put down the 400lb weights after 20 minutes.
I'm posting a little early today because it's New Years Eve and I'm hoping I'll be too drunk later to type.
Happy New Year to all of the wonderful people in my life!
Thursday, December 31, 2009
Wednesday, December 30, 2009
When the little voice in your head wins....
Again with the thousand excuses before even opening my eyes this am. I had a good one too...my costochondritis has flared up again and I couldn't get comfy all night. I could take it a step further and actually BLAME the exercise for this latest flare up...but I don't think you would buy it...so I wont insult your intelligence (at least not until I have a doctors note.)
Since I now feel "accountable"...I will come clean. I listened to my inner voice and took the day off from working out. Clearly I deserve this after TWO days in a row right? (rhetorical question, I know the answer..please do not respond...)
How did it all go so terribly wrong?
I planned on hitting it after a little morning work but before I had to leave at noon for an appointment...then it got too late and I had to get ready. Sooooo...my inner voice (aka my inner commentator; who sounds like Howard Cosell..but not he real Howard Cosell...the Chinese Howard Cosell in the HIT 80's movie "Better Off Dead") said..."it's okay, you can hit it when you get back home".
Well folks...I am ashamed to say...never happened. Then it was "When Chris gets home he can go down and help you with those arm machines"....Nada.....
Before I know it..it's 6:37 and I'm seeing notes on facebook about everyone else's workouts. Wow...I suck. I really, really suck. Why did I listen to my inner commentator? Because I LIKE what he was telling me...thats why.
Apparently Howard likes "big girls".......
~sigh~
So, tomorrow I will redeem myself my friends. I will shut old Howard down. I will hit the gym in the morning, first thing.
2 unrelated notes today.
#1 We are having spaghetti squash for dinner. We have never had it, and I thought it might be a healthy alternative to pasta.
#2 Janet Jackson has a new CD out available at Target. It is a 2 cd pack that has all of her #1 songs on it. It is a great workout CD. *if you make it to the gym*
I feel very little today...
not physically....
but mentally....
Since I now feel "accountable"...I will come clean. I listened to my inner voice and took the day off from working out. Clearly I deserve this after TWO days in a row right? (rhetorical question, I know the answer..please do not respond...)
How did it all go so terribly wrong?
I planned on hitting it after a little morning work but before I had to leave at noon for an appointment...then it got too late and I had to get ready. Sooooo...my inner voice (aka my inner commentator; who sounds like Howard Cosell..but not he real Howard Cosell...the Chinese Howard Cosell in the HIT 80's movie "Better Off Dead") said..."it's okay, you can hit it when you get back home".
Well folks...I am ashamed to say...never happened. Then it was "When Chris gets home he can go down and help you with those arm machines"....Nada.....
Before I know it..it's 6:37 and I'm seeing notes on facebook about everyone else's workouts. Wow...I suck. I really, really suck. Why did I listen to my inner commentator? Because I LIKE what he was telling me...thats why.
Apparently Howard likes "big girls".......
~sigh~
So, tomorrow I will redeem myself my friends. I will shut old Howard down. I will hit the gym in the morning, first thing.
2 unrelated notes today.
#1 We are having spaghetti squash for dinner. We have never had it, and I thought it might be a healthy alternative to pasta.
#2 Janet Jackson has a new CD out available at Target. It is a 2 cd pack that has all of her #1 songs on it. It is a great workout CD. *if you make it to the gym*
I feel very little today...
not physically....
but mentally....
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
Everyone should have a good friend...
So...I know some of you may be wondering...what could friendship possibly have to do with fitness...
We all need a good friend in our lives. In my case it's my husband.
That person that will tell you when you've messed up..that can be honest with you and you really CARE what they think so it makes you reconsider your actions. The person you bring with you to buy jeans (if your a woman). The one who when you say "do these make my but look fat?" says "YES!!! Dear god YES!!! Take them off IMMEDIATELY and let's never talk of this again!"
Today was day 2 at the gym. Before I even opened my eyes this morning my brain was already listing all of the REALLY great excuses NOT to go. But...(deep sigh) I can't give up already..plus I'm going to a party tonight and the exercise will eliminate at least a little of the guilt of eating bean dip, chips, and other yummy treats...
I hauled my ass down the street (walking down again despite the gale force winds!).
I entered to see the regular crowd (I'm assuming anyway..they were there yesterday ...) PLUS a new addition.
I just want to take a moment to say...
Thank you SO much Mr. Late 40's, overweight, shirtless workout guy. Do you not have a good friend to tell you NOT to do that...Just don't do that..put your shirt back on. You don't see me prancing my fat ass around in a thong body suit do you? Another thought. If you are wildly GASPING for air on the elliptical machine..step off my friend. I was looking around for the portable defibrillator. My concern was genuine...I was contemplating whether or not I'd perform mouth to mouth on you. I appreciate your vigor, but this is not a race. I am working at my own pace. You have nothing to prove on the machine beside me. CHILL my hairy, shirtless friend..don't hurt yourself!
I did manage to hang on for 35 minutes today by the way. So I DOUBLED my time. I did have the urge to remove my shirt so I'd fit in, but I resisted. I did not approach the arm machines. Though I'm sure hairy, shirtless guy would have helped me..I think I will wait for my husband. He'll tell me if I look stupid doing it! :) Have a great day my people!
We all need a good friend in our lives. In my case it's my husband.
That person that will tell you when you've messed up..that can be honest with you and you really CARE what they think so it makes you reconsider your actions. The person you bring with you to buy jeans (if your a woman). The one who when you say "do these make my but look fat?" says "YES!!! Dear god YES!!! Take them off IMMEDIATELY and let's never talk of this again!"
Today was day 2 at the gym. Before I even opened my eyes this morning my brain was already listing all of the REALLY great excuses NOT to go. But...(deep sigh) I can't give up already..plus I'm going to a party tonight and the exercise will eliminate at least a little of the guilt of eating bean dip, chips, and other yummy treats...
I hauled my ass down the street (walking down again despite the gale force winds!).
I entered to see the regular crowd (I'm assuming anyway..they were there yesterday ...) PLUS a new addition.
I just want to take a moment to say...
Thank you SO much Mr. Late 40's, overweight, shirtless workout guy. Do you not have a good friend to tell you NOT to do that...Just don't do that..put your shirt back on. You don't see me prancing my fat ass around in a thong body suit do you? Another thought. If you are wildly GASPING for air on the elliptical machine..step off my friend. I was looking around for the portable defibrillator. My concern was genuine...I was contemplating whether or not I'd perform mouth to mouth on you. I appreciate your vigor, but this is not a race. I am working at my own pace. You have nothing to prove on the machine beside me. CHILL my hairy, shirtless friend..don't hurt yourself!
I did manage to hang on for 35 minutes today by the way. So I DOUBLED my time. I did have the urge to remove my shirt so I'd fit in, but I resisted. I did not approach the arm machines. Though I'm sure hairy, shirtless guy would have helped me..I think I will wait for my husband. He'll tell me if I look stupid doing it! :) Have a great day my people!
Monday, December 28, 2009
Day 1
Okay people...I know it's not the "NEW YEAR" yet...but I simply can't wait another week. I fear my ass might double in size.
I'd like to point out that I did give my family full access to all of the holiday treats and goodies for a full 2 weeks.
I "cleaned out the kitchen" the day after Christmas. I purged the house of all the cookies, popcorn, toffee, fudge, chocolate kisses..
I put up with all kinds of crap from my family. My husband has decided he can go another week before climbing back on the wagon. "we always get this great candy in our stockings then you take it away!!" Waaaaaa!!
SOOOOOO I figured a compromise..I put all the goodies in a baggie that I vanquished to the garage.
Not far enough apparently. Maybe I should try my neighbors garage..
At any rate, I walked down to the "fitness center" in our neighborhood (I'd like to point out that I walked..not drove. It is half a block or so, but it was VERY cold and windy outside!) It's funny, we pay $49 a month in HOA's for this damn thing...I can honestly say I have not seen the inside of it in at least 2 years....
I was surprised (pleasantly) that they had upgraded the gym with all kinds of industrial strength torture devices. I can only figure out how to work a few. I was familiar with the elliptical machine. I used to be able to do a good 45 minutes on that bad boy with NO problem. Today's workout...12.3 minutes. Holy crap people...how embarrassing...to my EXTREME displeasure there were other people there...not just the over 80 crowd either..young..fit people.
I had to sit down.
I planted it on a stationary bike and managed to do 25 minutes there.
I tried out the weight machines for legs. I am somewhat familiar with these..though I fear the arm machines will require either assistance..or a good 30 minutes alone in the gym so I can actually READ the little instructions posted on the side of the machine without anyone seeing me. "Dude...check out the chubby blonde that doesn't know how to work the equipment" ugh!
After my trek back up the street home I was actually feeling pretty good!
If only you could bottle that feeling for the next morning when it comes time to drag your ass down there again!
We purchased Wii Fit for our household. The boys have been using it for a couple days. I took a quiet moment this afternoon to climb up on the little white platform (that looks nothing like a scale..but ohhhh yesss...it weighs you...) and was promptly informed that I was overweight. Not only in script...but it also transformed my little Wii person to this pudgy little thing. WTF people?
I managed to make it through the day with no major sugar withdrawal. I am hoping tomorrow will be better..who knows, maybe I'll be able to do a whole 15 minutes on elliptical!
I'd like to point out that I did give my family full access to all of the holiday treats and goodies for a full 2 weeks.
I "cleaned out the kitchen" the day after Christmas. I purged the house of all the cookies, popcorn, toffee, fudge, chocolate kisses..
I put up with all kinds of crap from my family. My husband has decided he can go another week before climbing back on the wagon. "we always get this great candy in our stockings then you take it away!!" Waaaaaa!!
SOOOOOO I figured a compromise..I put all the goodies in a baggie that I vanquished to the garage.
Not far enough apparently. Maybe I should try my neighbors garage..
At any rate, I walked down to the "fitness center" in our neighborhood (I'd like to point out that I walked..not drove. It is half a block or so, but it was VERY cold and windy outside!) It's funny, we pay $49 a month in HOA's for this damn thing...I can honestly say I have not seen the inside of it in at least 2 years....
I was surprised (pleasantly) that they had upgraded the gym with all kinds of industrial strength torture devices. I can only figure out how to work a few. I was familiar with the elliptical machine. I used to be able to do a good 45 minutes on that bad boy with NO problem. Today's workout...12.3 minutes. Holy crap people...how embarrassing...to my EXTREME displeasure there were other people there...not just the over 80 crowd either..young..fit people.
I had to sit down.
I planted it on a stationary bike and managed to do 25 minutes there.
I tried out the weight machines for legs. I am somewhat familiar with these..though I fear the arm machines will require either assistance..or a good 30 minutes alone in the gym so I can actually READ the little instructions posted on the side of the machine without anyone seeing me. "Dude...check out the chubby blonde that doesn't know how to work the equipment" ugh!
After my trek back up the street home I was actually feeling pretty good!
If only you could bottle that feeling for the next morning when it comes time to drag your ass down there again!
We purchased Wii Fit for our household. The boys have been using it for a couple days. I took a quiet moment this afternoon to climb up on the little white platform (that looks nothing like a scale..but ohhhh yesss...it weighs you...) and was promptly informed that I was overweight. Not only in script...but it also transformed my little Wii person to this pudgy little thing. WTF people?
I managed to make it through the day with no major sugar withdrawal. I am hoping tomorrow will be better..who knows, maybe I'll be able to do a whole 15 minutes on elliptical!
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